Funny Alcohol Quotes

These are some funny quotes about Alcohol.

"Instead of warning pregnant women not to drink, I think female alcoholics should be told not to f**k"
~George Carlin

"Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me."
~ Winston Churchill

"I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me."
~ Hunter S. Thompson

"Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life."
~George Bernard Shaw

Yes, madam, I am drunk. But in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.
~Winston Churchill

"An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools."
~Ernest Hemingway

" Work is the curse of the drinking class."
~ Oscar Wilde

Alcoholism is the only disease that you can get yelled at for having.
~Mitch Hedberg

The problem with some people is that when they aren't drunk, they're sober.
~ William Butler Yeats

Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer.
~ Henry Lawson

I feel sorry for people who don’t drink. They wake up in the morning and that’s the best they’re going to feel all day.

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder
~Kinky Friedman

Prohibition makes you want to cry into your beer and denies you the beer to cry into.
~ Don Marquis

Brewers enjoy working to make beer as much as drinking beer instead of working
~Harold Rudolph

"Beer is the reason I get out of bed every afternoon."
~ Anonymous

"Why is there so much wine left at the end of my money? "
~ Milan Maximovich

One of the hallmarks of the baby boomer generation is that it doesn’t live like the previous generation. It hasn’t yet given up jeans and T-shirts or beer.
~ Ron Klugman, Coors Brewing

A drunk mans words are a sober man’s thoughts.
~ Steve Fergosi

The water was not fit to drink. To make it palatable, we had to add whiskey. By diligent effort, I learned to like it.
~ Sir Winston Churchill

I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds, and fast cars. The rest I just squandered. ~ George Best

Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
~Benjamin Franklin

I'm not as think as you drunk I am.
~Mega Jones

The best beer in the world, is the open bottle in your hand!
~Danny Jansen

"I tried to drown my sorrows, but the bastards learned how to swim, and now I am overwhelmed by this decent and good feeling."
~ Frida Kahlo

Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy."
~Frank Sinatra

Hope you enjoyed these Alcohol Sayings


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